Hey guys! Welcome to episode 8 of the Senior Studio Success Podcast. This has been so much fun already & I just love how this little community it has started to bring together. Thank you guys for reaching out over on Instagram, for joining the Facebook group, for leaving reviews & sharing screenshots in your stories to help get the word out about the show. I am forever grateful to you guys!

Now last week I told you that I would have a little surprise for you & I’m gonna let you in on it at the end of this episode. Don’t go skipping to the end right now. You hang tight with me! We’re gonna talk about something really important today, especially if you are a mom. I’m not saying that this doesn’t happen for dads too. I know it does, but I think this issue is definitely more common for women than men. So let’s get to it.

Have you ever been so overwhelmed with mom guilt that you just buckled under the weight & cried until you couldn’t cry anymore? I have. I ran a full time studio, juggled clients, 3 boys in different schools with early morning & late evening sports practices, with a husband that worked out of town. I didn’t have time to go to the bathroom, let alone spend quality time with my kids.

My business had grown tremendously, but I was holding on tightly to any & everything I could control. I did all the jobs - voicemail, email, reminder calls, consults, sessions, sales, editing, ordering, framing, shipping, pick ups, inventory, cleaning the bathrooms, hanging backdrops. All. The. Things.

I let it completely take over my life, and then I was just stuck because I didn’t have time to fix it because I was just one person.

So I broke down. I was failing as a mom. I was failing as a business person. I was failing as a wife if I’m being honest because I was very resentful for having to do it all myself, when in reality some of that was a choice. The perfectionist in me wouldn’t let some things go though.

Mom guilt can be one of the hardest things to deal with as a photographer. In this episode of the Senior Studio Success Podcast, I share my own story and give you tips for dealing with that guilt & working smarter to avoid it. You can be a good mom and a good businesswoman at the same time.

It eventually worked itself out & I figured out a lot of things to finally give me some breathing room in my business & again with my kiddos. Then the guilt finally started to fade away.

I learned how to set boundaries & set a schedule that kept me from getting too overwhelmed. So that’s what we are gonna talk about today.

Boundaries are about creating space & setting your intention around where you are giving your attention at any one moment in time. When you can give your attention to one thing you’re going to do a better job at that one thing. When we jumble it all up & try to do multiple things at one time we can’t give the best version of ourselves to any one thing.

As women, we want to give the best of ourselves to everyone & everything all of the time. But when we try to do it all at once we end up feeling like failures. That is exactly where I was.

If your kids are running around playing while you are trying to edit or write emails or work on your business in some way, you aren’t giving either of them, your kids or your clients, the best of you. You’re giving them a less than best version of you.

Boundaries are about making space so you can give the best. It’s about being strict about your time. You have to be able to say “ today I am playing with my kids & I’m gonna be all mom. But tomorrow my kids are going to the sitter and I am putting on my CEO hat. Tomorrow is all about my clients & my business.”

How do we get to that point though?

Five Tips For Dealing With Mom Guilt

First, you have to decide that setting boundaries is doable.
You have to believe that you can be BOTH a good mom and a good businesswoman.
Communicating your business hours & boundaries with your clients will save your life. On the flip side, you gotta communicate that with the kids & your spouse too. That’s not always easy when they are little, but there are ways to teach them. Put a little sign on your door, make it cute & fun that says “Mommy’s At Work” & teach them that it is their quiet time with a book or paper & crayons. Start it slow, 15 minutes at a time, then increase it. Give them a little reward. Get a sticker chart & let them earn a prize or a trip to the park. Even if it buys you an hour, that is an hour of focused & dedicated time to your business. Then you can go give your kids that same thing.
When we’re multitasking & juggling there’s a lot of guilt because we feel like we are letting everyone down. But when you can give your best in one place at one time the guilt starts to fade away a bit.
This is one of the very first things we work on inside Studio Secrets because I believe so passionately about it now. What is the point in having an amazing business if you feel like a failure as a mom? I love the ladies in that group. They made some really hard decisions and some bold moves to protect their time this past year. I’m so proud of them!
Realize that there is no such thing as work/life balance.
What is right for you for the season of life you are in right now? If your kids are really young, give yourself some grace. Or if they are heading into their senior year, slow down & enjoy it. There’s no right or wrong answer. You have to decide what is best for the season of life that you are in.
Define what success looks like to you right now.
Is it 2 clients a week? Is it 2 clients a month? Is it 12 clients? Is it not working after 5:00 pm? Is it a certain dollar amount in your savings account? Is it having the ability to be home when your kids get off the bus in the afternoons? Is it a paid-off car? It’s your life & success looks different to everyone. But you have to define it so you know when you’re there. And that definition will change with time. That’s ok too :)
Create your calendar around what is right for you right now & be all in wherever you are.
That divided attention brings the guilt - for your business & your family - when you aren’t giving either your undivided attention.

Is your focus somewhere you’re not?

Ok, I’m gonna say it. Get off your durn phone. Put it down at the dinner table, at the restaurant, at your kid’s practice. Just be present where you are. Guess why I can say that? Because I was horrible about this! Not really at my kids’ practices. I loved watching every minute of them, but definitely on the couch at night or at dinner.

We miss so much when we aren’t fully present. We miss moments with our kids when we are thinking about work & we miss moments & drop balls with clients when we are trying to work with a baby on our laps.

You have to mentally decide “right now I am a businesswoman” or “right now during this time I am the best mom ever”.

Here’s where we get tripped up:

Doing too many things.
Doing the wrong things.
Not doing the right things.

1. Doing too many things.

When you carry the load of too many things, eventually something will break. You can’t do it alone.

2. Doing the wrong things.

If you hate the things on your calendar or on your to-do list, you will always feel out of balance, resentful & guilty for spending time on them when you want to be doing something else. Do you loathe editing? If that’s you, then stop. There’s no photography police out there to write you a ticket for not doing every single job in your business.

3. Not doing the right things.

Look at your calendar. Where are you spending your time? Does it line up with what you say your priorities are? Do you say that getting healthy is a priority but it’s nowhere to be found on your calendar? That was me for a long time. Is your relationship with your kids a priority but you aren’t dedicating a little bit of one on one time with them each week? The same goes for your spouse.

Of course, there will be guilt if you are spending time on things that you don’t care about. That weight is on you because there are inconsistencies in what you say is important and how you’re actually spending your time.

But let’s do this you guys because there are a lot of strong women & strong mamas listening to this podcast. I know. You’ve told me your stories, and you are amazing. Do not doubt that & do not ever sell yourself short.

Acknowledge & give yourself credit for the things you did get done each day instead of beating yourself up about the 4 things you didn’t get done.

Be proud of all the things you are accomplishing & doing right instead of feeling guilty about what you’re doing wrong. Take a few minutes each day to be proud of what you did get done!

More than anything, give yourself grace when you screw up. It’s gonna happen & that’s ok. We aren’t perfect. Nobody expects perfection, not your clients, not your kids, not your spouse.

Do those things we talked about:

Decide that setting boundaries is doable.
Believe that you can be BOTH a good mom and a good businesswoman.
Realize that there is no such thing as work/life balance.
Define what success looks like to you right now.
Create your calendar around what is right for you right now & be all in wherever you are.

This is doable you guys. You absolutely can be a good mom and a good businesswoman at the same time. I fully believe that.

Now, are you ready for that surprise?

Coming up in just 4 weeks is something very big. I’ll be hosting a 3-day workshop called The Road To CEO and I want you there!

On Day One I’m going to talk about how broken the typical photography business model is today & how to turn yours into a well-oiled machine.

On Day Two I’m going to break down in detail the one system that has booked the most clients in my business.

And Day Three is all about having a CEO mindset instead of an employee mindset & how that one change can completely determine the outcome of your success.

This is completely free to you guys & I would love to have you there with me.

You can register at www.seniorstudiosuccess.com/ceo.

I can’t wait to get started. That Facebook group will open October 19th & we already have some fun stuff planned for guys there, so head on over & register to save your spot.

DON’T MISS THIS

If you need somebody to come along beside you and help you do business the right way so that you can bring home a paycheck, spend more time with your family and save for retirement then you need Studio Secrets.

The doors open on November 4th for something very special for a handful of photographers who are ready to get laser-focused on their businesses.

Studio Secrets is a 6 month business coaching intensive where we dive deep into your business together. It’s not a DIY course on one or two topics. This is EVERYTHING you could ever need to know (and all the tools & resources) to run a senior photography business - branding, messaging, websites, pricing, sales, marketing, social media, senior model teams, systems, workflow, automation and SO MUCH MORE! And bonus - you get me to lead you through it in our hot seat calls and a private community to bounce ideas around with.

If you’re ready to turn your expensive hobby into a thriving business be sure you are on the waitlist. You can do that at www.seniorstudiosuccess.com/studiosecrets.

Plus everyone on that wait list will save $500 on launch day - November 4th. Woohoo! I can’t wait to work with you!

JOIN MY 6 MONTH BUSINESS COACHING INTENSIVE WAIT LIST - DOORS OPEN NOV 4TH!

If you want to continue this conversation there’s a facebook group dedicated to all the business stuff behind our pretty pictures and I’d love to have you there.

I’d love to connect with you on Instagram as well. Screenshot this episode, tag me and share it to your story! And if you’re the type of person who loves to help other people the biggest and most awesome thing you could do right now is to give this podcast a rating and review on iTunes. That helps it get found by other amazing photographers around the world who want to build their dream businesses too.

Until next time my friends, see ya soon!